I’ve come up with two simple rules that will make the world a better place:

  1. No spokespersons. Spokespersons, official or otherwise, are outlawed. If you want to say something, you have to say it yourself. If it’s not worth saying yourself, it’s not worth saying.
  2. No ghostwriters. If you’re going to write a book, you have to do the work yourself. No “as told to” or “with” or worst of all, paying someone to write it and then simply putting your name on it.

This LOOKS like English…I mean I recognize the words and the punctuation. But what the hell language is it REALLY?

“If oil ‘goes above $120 on a sustainable basis, you will have a meaningful shortfall in global growth relative to what current consensus expects,’ Jonathan Garner, Morgan Stanley’s Hong Kong-based chief Asia and emerging-market strategist, said in a Bloomberg Television interview. ‘We’re in for a period of extended uncertainty, and that’s not good news for the equity risk premium.’ “

Ghadaffi. Qadaffi. Gadhafi. Kadaffi. Khadaffi. Khadafi. Gaddafi. Would someone in the media please just get him to decide how he wants his goddamn name spelled? Please?